dear Mikki and Katie…

i can smell a tantrum in the Walmart toy isle from across the store. the embarrassment that oozes through the mile long isles of worn concrete floors and potato chips in bulk can be felt by every cringing mother thankful that it is not their own child (this time). the elderly people shake their heads in colossal shame, thinking poorly of “the young people of today”, and the underpaid clerks brace themselves for a clean up of epic proportions after the lady, with her screaming babe on her hip, abandon her cart mid-experience. i wish i could say that neither of you two have blessed me with your own spectacular rendition of Midsummer Night Dream meets Macbeth in a toy tragedy, but alas, I have not been spared this all too familiar motherly experience. (hence my plague like avoidance of any toy isle….ever.) still, i have yet to blame a child for any such antics, even in my hot faced, ever so close to crying and/or my ready to severely discipline state of mind. because, girls, there is “too much”. of everything. and we all get wrapped up in the “too much” mentality.  i stepped on yet another “Littlest Pet Shop” walking down the hall sleepily in my bare feet on the way to the shrine (otherwise known as the coffee pot) this morning, and cursed all that is commercial and excessive in explicit, inappropriate detail. and while i feel that daddy and i don’t spoil you rotten, the mounting “i want this” comments coming from the other side of the noise picture box where a commercial presents yet another plastic thing i am bound to swear about has gotten out of hand. and yes, i had a lot of toys when i was a child. too many to count or even care about. but it’s even worse now because instead of just a couple isles of semi nicely made toys there are 12-24 isles of plastic stuff made for a dollar and sold for $14.99. (next week it will go on sale for $9.99 to make room for more and more and more and more). and by the time you guys have kids, there might be 24-50 isles of worrisome, dizzying, “too much”.  and while it may seem like i am standing on my soap box and preaching about the evils of toys, let me say that i don’t think they are evil at all. i love toys. i even love the Littlest Pet Shop animals that i curse on a semi-regular basis. what worries me, girls, is what you can’t find in those endless isles of mass production. and that is attention. and that is a simple conversation. and that is (most times) education. and that is the joy that comes from togetherness. and that is love. and while a toy may certainly BE loved, one-thousand of them can’t.

oh and this “too much” thing applies for us adults too. there is WAY “too much” of everything for us too…and it all makes me want to crawl into the 19th century sometimes (only with toilet paper and toilets because that is just good stuff there) when things were harder i’m sure, but there was less stuff and more to talk about.

all my love darlings,

p.s. daily mantra: “sometimes the questions are complicated and the answers are simple.” {dr.seuss}

Daily Mantra:

I went to the doctor, I went to the mountains
I looked to the children, I drank from the fountains
There’s more than one answer to these questions
Pointing me in a crooked line
And the less I seek my source for some definitive
The closer I am to fine

{the.indigo.girls}

dear Mikki and Katie….

i don’t have much to say today. except you are such genuinely good girls. you bring me more happiness than golden rod yellow striped tube socks and dunkin donuts coffee. i am so blessed my head could pop off.

all my love darlings,

p.s. daily mantra: “what you leave behind is not what is engraved on stone monuments, but what is woven into the lives of others.” {Perciles}

Daily Mantra:

Yes the world is the best place of all
for a lot of such things as
making the fun scene
and making the love scene
and making the sad scene
and singing low songs and having inspirations
and walking around
looking at everything
and smelling flowers
and goosing statues
and even thinking
and kissing people and
making babies and wearing pants
and waving hats and
dancing
and going swimming in rivers
on picnics
in the middle of the summer
and just generally
‘living it up’

{lawrence.ferlingetti}

****

something struck me in Conan’s speech…the honesty, and his overall non-bitterness about the whole situation. i never watched the Tonight Show regularly, but his last late night breath of thankfulness oozed out and glowed. his one wish…for people, especially young people, to not be cynical and to be kind. it really made me think…about the general attitude of our nation and our world and i began to wonder where the happy people went. last night, i tried to watch the movie Twilight. the kids (now that i am almost 30 i can say officially, i am safely out of adolescence thank goodness) in the  movie were just so sad. i turned it off an hour in. (please don’t pillage my person for saying so…) despite hormonal disruption, dealing with divorce (my father was actually divorced twice), drama filled break ups, and other issues, i would have to say that i was a pretty happy teen as were most of my friends who probably had problems far greater than my own. i am still happy. i really, truly am. but have you ever been around people that are cynically sarcastic, only to find yourself jumping on the “woe is me” bandwagon instead of resisting it? i do this all the time, and you know what….i am done with it.  there is plenty of good…overflowing good, even, in my life and in this world. being a negative person isn’t a good look for me…or anyone.

and thanks to the wonder that is the internet…

i came across this article written by Mark Morford of the San Fransisco Chronicle that is just brilliant…

Why are you so terribly disappointing?

What the hell is wrong with you? Are you really going to wear that? Why aren’t you right now cooking me a nice meal and wearing those hot boy shorts you know I love and saying those words you know I want to hear at exactly the moment I like to hear them, to make me feel better about everything, even though I probably won’t?

for clients who purchase albums, i offer a slideshow so they can view it directly on their computer or tv and check out every little detail of their book and photographs before ordering.

check out Brian and Melissa’s slideshow by clicking the link: http://labellavitablog.com/brian_n_mel/index.html

it has been over a year since photographing a newborn baby girl. it just seems like there have been more boys born lately. sweet Lyla {the best name ever!} did not disappoint. this little love was filled with great expressions and overall cuddly cuteness. there truly is something so special about baby girls for me. it sends me back to my own girls…and i always leave the session feeling full and sentimental about their ever so short newborn stage.

daily mantra:

“if the sight of the blue skies fills you with joy, if a blade of grass springing up in the fields has power to move you, if the simple things of nature have a message that you understand, rejoice, for your soul is alive.”

{eleonora.duse}

in one of my many temporarily scholastic ambitions, i took an ever so random class at the University of Maine on world religion and personal values. it was $1200, and the book was $325. {i remember this explicitly, and as this is an opportunity to brag about the fact that my parents never paid a single dime for me to attend college, i am just putting the cost out there…and i am pretty sure that i am still paying for it in my mounted student loan debt}. this overpriced, impractical {as in it didn’t count at ALL towards my major in any way, shape or form} class was perhaps the most valuable i have every taken in my life.

what it taught me, in the end, was about nothing other than hypocrisy. and, strangely, i don’t mean that negatively in the least.

personally…i have a high set of moral values. when i look in the mirror every day, i hope {and dream, and desire more than anything} that i live up to them. i hope that they rub off onto you through hugs, long lectures, and kinetic energy. and sometimes, most times, i find myself trying to make other people fit into my too tight jeans of high minded nobility. too tight jeans that, might i also add, i never quite fit into either.  i fail miserably actually. and although one of my many {many, many} individual, well intended ideals is to not judge others too harshly for anything, i all too often do just that.

girls, we all have values we set for ourselves.  in your life, you are constantly going to battle with the image you aspire to portray to the world. you are constantly going to battle with the image you want to possess within yourself. you and every one else around you will objectify hypocrisy in its truest form. forgive and understand others for this inconsistent moral wish wash, and most importantly, forgive yourselves.

all my love darlings,

p.s. daily mantra: “expect nothing, live frugally on surprise.” {alice.walker}

dear mikki and katie….

we are on the cusp of 2010. while i find new years resolutions are often bright lights of doomed failure laying in the shadows, i do feel that goals on an every day, every week, every  month, etc. basis are not only important but a way to measure your own personal growth.  so, i sat you both down on our living room couch and asked you, with all seriousness and formality, what your goals were for this up coming new year.

Mikki…your goal was to use better manners and whine less. this is why you are my favorite.  because despite this lofty ambition {one i should perhaps try myself even} you already have impeccable manners for a 6 year old. your other goal was to have more fun….which is brilliant. i think every one’s yearly mission should be to have more fun.

Katie…your goal was to eat more cookies and learn about rocket ships. hmmmm….yes. this was a typical Katie answer.

the dawning of 2010 has left mommy in a bit of a panic. first, i will be 30. when i tried to explain 30 to you this morning, Mikki, you said simply. . . “holy moly, Mom, that is a big number.”

awesome.

i usually make some ridiculously unattainable weight loss goal. i am not going to do that this year…set yourself up for success right? this year i resolve to eat fewer cookies {unlike you, Katie}. i will put my Jillian Michael’s DVD at least once a week, if for nothing else than to make me feel guilty for not having the fortitude to put it in more often. {guilt is a good motivator for me} moreover, my goal for 2010 is to simply hit the PAUSE button once in a while on life. the whirling, twirling of time this past year has left me feeling not only disoriented but robbed of moments that i didn’t stop and enjoy. 2010 is definitely the year where i unplug the computer more  and leave my blackberry in my purse {…in the closet…under a pile of neatly folded blankets which has a pile of dirty clothes on it….yes, it takes that much to get me away from my blackberry}.

so here is to more fun, less whining, more {and less} cookies, and more stopping to smell the roses, girls…

all my love darlings,

p.s. daily mantra: “sometimes you just have to take the leap and build your wings on the way down”….{kobi.yamada}

p.p.s: one of my goals for 2010 was to rebuild, and redesign my website. i am checking this one off the list: check it out! http://www.labellavitaphotos.com/

dear Mikki and Katie…

when you are a mom, the grocery store is always an epic adventure, with nail biting moments of anxiety mixed with provocative conversation mostly surrounding the word…”no”. yesterday was no different than any other day i pack you two up in your car seats and head off to store down the road, but perhaps i am coming out of my summer wedding work coma long enough to clue in to what you say under your breath when i actually say that two letter word….

let’s start off with me telling you both that there is no word i hate more than “no”. i don’t like saying it and i definitely don’t like hearing it. in fact, i have tried my whole life to surround myself with people who say “yes”. the word “yes” has a dramatically different sound rolling off your tongue; infinitely more pleasing. that being said, i wrap myself in the word “no” daily when it comes to the task of mothering.

no, Katie, you can’t have another cookie. no, you can’t watch Milo and Otis again. no, you can’t play cannon ball by jumping off the side bar and into the couch. no, Mikki, you can’t have that doll, that bear, that pair of earrings (you don’t  even have pierced ears so what is the point?!!!), or that Power Wheels Barbie car (why? well, because my dad never let me have one). no, you can’t touch that…it’s hot. no, you can’t breathe underwater. no you can’t. no…really…you can’t. FINE….go ahead and try. you do, and 10 seconds later you are crying, Katie. i feel like i somehow dared you to do it so i suck at being a mom…but no, this is now a tested fact, you CANNOT breathe underwater.

so yesterday, as we were all in the grocery store- in the cereal isle to be more precise, you guys run up to me with your most adorable grins and a magical box of none other than Lucky Charms. don’t get me wrong girls, i am not an all organic mother…i will on occasion break for that box of sugary, ridiculously overpriced cereal. i’m not above it. sure, i try to push the fruit or yogurt on you first, but i have actually said yes, many, many times to these types of things. yesterday though, i was actually present in body and mind, and said “no” to Lucky Charms. not for your health, girls…not even for you teethe.

“no, Mikayla. i refuse to buy a box of cereal where it only gets half eaten and then sits in the cupboard after it is stripped of its marshmallows.” i could feel my own mother seeping out of my pores, and my mind floated back to not a month ago when i was cleaning out the lazy susan and found not one, not two, but THREE half empty boxes of Lucky Charms; the soft, teeth rotting “charms” gobbled to the last nibble. all that was left was the unlucky part of Lucky Charms.

“that isn’t fair, Mommy…we never get what we want!” your voice bellowed around your body as you walked (stomped) away to put it back and pick a more appropriate cereal that would meet my approval.

we left the grocery store (with no cereal at all, mind you), both of you with pouting faces, and me in the inevitable bad mood that comes from not only having to fight with you both, but having to say the word “no”, and then having to pay for all the items in the end.

as i unpacked at home, you had both moved on to bigger and better things, and i was still simmering in my own thirsty thoughts. fair?! FAIR?!?! i had been up since 1am working on a wedding, i had done so much laundry i think the drier was actually moaning near the end, i had cleaned the bathroom, done the dishes, sewn a button (okay…so i love sewing buttons, it gives me such a peaceful feeling…buttons….i’m a dork…sorry), and did i mention i cleaned the bathroom! fair?!

life.isn’t.fair.

i sat cross legged in the middle of the kitchen floor and patted the cat as she rubbed against my knees. you two were laughing down the hall in your bedroom. the sound tickled and pulled my mood into smiley faces again. yes, life isn’t fair. not one bit.

but, its still good.

great even.

all my love darlings,

mommy

p.s.  daily mantra: “goodness is the only investment that never fails” {henry.david.thoreau}

Kali and Matt wanted to do something unique at their wedding and have a photo booth type area where people could just be their crazy selves and let loose.

This post is dedicated to crazy….and the people who brought it.

daily mantra:

“live life fully while you’re here. experience everything. take care of yourself and your friends.

have fun, be crazy, be weird. go out and screw up! you’re going to anyway, so you might as well enjoy the process.

take the opportunity to learn from your mistakes:

find the cause of your problem and eliminate it.

don’t try to be perfect; just be an excellent example of being human.”

{anthony.robbins}