Archive for January, 2010
Daily Mantra:
Yes the world is the best place of all
for a lot of such things as
making the fun scene
and making the love scene
and making the sad scene
and singing low songs and having inspirations
and walking around
looking at everything
and smelling flowers
and goosing statues
and even thinking
and kissing people and
making babies and wearing pants
and waving hats and
dancing
and going swimming in rivers
on picnics
in the middle of the summer
and just generally
‘living it up’
{lawrence.ferlingetti}
****
something struck me in Conan’s speech…the honesty, and his overall non-bitterness about the whole situation. i never watched the Tonight Show regularly, but his last late night breath of thankfulness oozed out and glowed. his one wish…for people, especially young people, to not be cynical and to be kind. it really made me think…about the general attitude of our nation and our world and i began to wonder where the happy people went. last night, i tried to watch the movie Twilight. the kids (now that i am almost 30 i can say officially, i am safely out of adolescence thank goodness) in the movie were just so sad. i turned it off an hour in. (please don’t pillage my person for saying so…) despite hormonal disruption, dealing with divorce (my father was actually divorced twice), drama filled break ups, and other issues, i would have to say that i was a pretty happy teen as were most of my friends who probably had problems far greater than my own. i am still happy. i really, truly am. but have you ever been around people that are cynically sarcastic, only to find yourself jumping on the “woe is me” bandwagon instead of resisting it? i do this all the time, and you know what….i am done with it. there is plenty of good…overflowing good, even, in my life and in this world. being a negative person isn’t a good look for me…or anyone.
and thanks to the wonder that is the internet…
i came across this article written by Mark Morford of the San Fransisco Chronicle that is just brilliant…
Why are you so terribly disappointing?
What the hell is wrong with you? Are you really going to wear that? Why aren’t you right now cooking me a nice meal and wearing those hot boy shorts you know I love and saying those words you know I want to hear at exactly the moment I like to hear them, to make me feel better about everything, even though I probably won’t?
What happened to my bonus? What happened to my job? What happened to my country? Why can’t it all go the way it’s supposed to go? You mean having a kid won’t solve my marriage problems? Why don’t these drugs make me feel better? Where’s that goddamn waiter with my salad? Have you seen the stupid weather today? Is this really all there is?
These are, from what I can glean, the most important questions of the day, of the month, of modern life itself. Hell, what with the economy and job situation, the housing market and the overall feel and texture of the nation right now, it’s no wonder Americans are, by and large, a goddamn miserable bunch. We don’t like anything right now. No politician, no decision, no situation, no inhale, no exhale. We are sick to death of all of it, including ourselves.
Can you blame us? Have you seen how many things there to be disappointed about these days? Love. Sex. Marriage. Stock market. God. Gas mileage. Death. Air travel. 5/9ths of the Supreme Court. It’s all just a big goddamn letdown. The list is endless. And getting endlesser.
The evidence is everywhere. I calculate it took about seven minutes, give or take, after Steve Jobs finished introducing the shinypretty iPad before the whiny attacks on the wondergizmo began flooding in, how it didn’t have this or that expected feature, how it can’t do live video chat, doesn’t have Flash, the bezel is too big and it won’t double as a meat thermometer, how it doesn’t really revolutionize much of anything despite how it’s, you know, this gorgeous 1.5-pound slab of aluminum and glass that works flawlessly and can perform roughly one thousand tasks in a more fluid and astonishing way than any device of its kind in history.
Big f–ing deal. We just do not care. It’s all a big disappointment. Hey, I was expecting to be blown away. I was expecting miracles and transformations and multiple twitching orgasms on sight. Do not come at me with tantalizing promises only to reveal that you can fulfill most of them to a fairly good degree, and not far exceed all of them in every imaginable way. We’re Americans, goddammit. Ye shall know us by the tang of our bitter and untenable jadedness.
Also, global warming? Total effing letdown. Americans are no longer believing in it. Do you know why? Not because the mountains of scientific proof aren’t there. Not because it’s not happening. But because it’s not yet happening to us like they said it would in the movies and those worst-case scenario books. Where are the zombies? The ice forests? Where’s the tidal wave crashing over the Himalayas? I want my goddamn apocalypse, and I want it now.
Hey, you annoying gay people? Ditto, to you. All this uproar about rights and gender, all this talk about how gay marriage is now legal in a handful of states, and still the very fabric of whinysad 50-percent divorce rate Christian society has yet to unravel and cause riots and induce all white Midwestern children to spontaneously combust. I mean, WTF? So disappointing.
My God, did you hear that pathetic State of the Union? That guy, that President Obama? Disappointing times a thousand, am I right? What the hell happened to him? Why is he so weak and ineffectual? Why the hell can’t he step up and fix the entire planet in under 400 days like he promised he would, in my dreams and fantasies and impossible liberal grass-fed organic tofu greengasms? Doesn’t he know I put a goddamn bumper sticker on my Subaru for him? I’ve never done that for anyone. Bastard.
He’s only accomplished what, about 100 of the things I expected him to accomplish by now? Big deal. I have, like, 5,000 more. Health care reform has failed. Guantanamo is still open. Wars are still warring. Jobs are still sucking. Gays are still unhappy because the entire human understanding of love and gender in this nation has not completely transformed within a year. Infuriating!
But the biggest disappointment of all? Turns out one calm n’ brilliant Barack Obama isn’t enough to solve the problem of 535 vile n’ slothful congressional jackals who aren’t Barack Obama. Go figure.
Shall we recall just how violently disappointed those fundamentalists were when Bush bumbled off the stage, the single greatest disaster as president we will ever know? They were, of course, mostly disappointed Bush wasn’t able to do far more repellant damage than he did. They wanted nothing less than full-scale war on Islam, death to all abortion doctors, creationism in schools, homosexuality banned outright, all you scary women to please stop it with your needy n’ terrifying vaginas. You know, the usual.
And now it’s the hardcore Dems’ turn, in reverse. Obama cannot do enough good, fast enough. He is failing as our personal SuperJesus. Not because he’s not accomplishing volumes and making all sorts of history, but because we were expecting total mindblowing revolution. Hey, it’s his own fault, right? He’s the one that set out one of the most ambitious agendas in presidential history to go along with the million-mile hole he has to dig us out of first. Can you blame us for whining?
But we don’t stop there. Not only are we disappointed, we need to express it. Vent it. Hiss it and spit it and hurl it like fistfuls of mental manure at the great wall of hey, screw you.
You have but to take a peek in the comments section below this column, any column, any article on this or any news site whatsoever, to see just how mean and nasty we have become. It does not matter what the piece might be about. Obama’s speech. High speed rail. Popular dog breeds. Your grandmother’s cookies. The anonymous comments section of any major media site or popular blog will be so crammed with bile and bickering, accusation and pule, hatred and sneer you can’t help but feel violently disappointed by the shocking lack of basic human kindness and respect, much less a sense of positivism or perspective.
Maybe this, then, is the ultimate upshot of our endless, self-wrought swirl of sour disappointment, of never having our impossible needs fully met, of constantly being thwarted in our desire to have the world revolve around our exact set of specifications and desires.
Our disappointment begins to curdle, to turn back on itself, poison the heart, turn us nasty and low. It shifts from merely being a national mood or general temperament, into a way of being. A wiring, deep and harmful and permanent. It’s all very disappointing, really.
Want to pass it on…here is the link: http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/g/a/2010/01/29/notes012910.DTL
daily mantra:
“people ask me when they walk into the shop which artist is the best and most well known…i tell them, the most popular artist is the one YOU love the most…”
{mexican.art.gallery.host}
my welcome home present….this beautiful canvas of Brian and Melissa custom wrapped by Roxanne and Company at Pixel 2 Canvas. after trying several canvas companies, i have finally found my home at Pixel 2 Canvas, a company that caters exclusively to professional photographers and just creates the most magical printed canvas i have ever seen. my advice to clients wanting a canvas… GO BIG!! this is a true investment in your personal history that will last a lifetime. Brian and Mel chose the 20 x 30….and honestly it has inspired me to think bigger for my own home gallery.
image from Pondering Pools: www.ponderingpools.com
dear Mikki and Katie…
i grew up in a family business that i thought had taught me one thing above all others: that i KNEW i never wanted to go into business for myself….like EVER. i can’t count the times my mom and dad had to give up something they wanted to do to tend to the responsibilities that would suddenly pop up at the last minute; or the times they canceled plans or had to go without sleep, or even without basic necessities to make the business work and run. in my teen years i finally saw their love for their work, but also their ever mounting stress and strife. i honestly always thought i would be one of those girls to always punch a time clock and happily leave the work at the office at the end of the day. when i went into business 3 years ago though, i didn’t do it blindly. because while people comment and say how lucky i am to “make my own hours”, i knew that making my own hours just meant that i work ALL hours, not JUST between the hours of 9am to 5pm.
owning my own business has taught me just how far one person is willing to go to make someone else happy. while, yes, my business is in photography,more often than not, it is about selling myself on a daily basis. selling my product, and selling myself, and convincing people to trust me with their memories, their babies and children, their once in a lifetime moments. but what it has taught me more than any single one thing, is confidence. and i am finding that confidence isn’t about always being perfect 100% of the time or even 90% of the time, its about being YOU 100% of the time. because being genuine and real and confident in THAT, will fill you and please just about anyone.
all my love darlings,
mommy.
p.s. “the greatest barrier to success is the fear of failure.” {sven.goran.eriksson}
p.p.s. i found this artist on my latest adventure. she is what i feel in every way.
well….i have spend the last year trying to find what works best for me as far as coffee table books and i have finally found it. the pictures really do no such justice to the stunning quality of this album. ultra thick pages, beautiful color, and just an over all luxurious feel.
for clients who purchase albums, i offer a slideshow so they can view it directly on their computer or tv and check out every little detail of their book and photographs before ordering.
check out Brian and Melissa’s slideshow by clicking the link: http://labellavitablog.com/brian_n_mel/index.html
dear Mikki and Katie…
a total unrelated photo today. sometimes you need a random photo, right?
last week i was in Portland on a session. while passing down a major 3 lane street, i witnessed an almost accident where one car came tragically close to side swiping the other. all i could think about was how blissfully lucky both drivers had been as i stopped at the light. however, the driver who was ‘almost’ (yes…almost, as in not actually hit, no damage done, no bumps or scratches, or calls to the insurance company) hit jumped out of his car in a furry and started waving his hands frantically at the other driver in the car, nearly causing yet another accident. i couldn’t help stare in fear and long to be home in my one lane roads in Rumford where if you almost hit someone you waive embarrassingly and perhaps shamefully, and the other driver just rolls their eyes and shrugs their shoulders, but continues about their day and probably has forgotten about it by the next turn.
i am an aggressive driver. some would say i am a bad driver, but i call it aggressive and i am comfortable with that term even if its a semi lie to myself. i drive so frequently over the state now, i know where my radio will fade in and out, the exact spot on the left side heading east on route 2 where a pothole will swallow your car if you hit it, and where i can and can’t get away with speeding. and although road rage rarely comes over me, i have been known to flip a few drivers off on Broadway in Bangor and once in a while in Brewer. {what is it about Broadway in Bangor?} anyway…what was the point in my flipping them off? i mean…even if the dirty snow covered windows of the Honda Accord were cleaned to a virtual mirror shine, they probably wouldn’t see it, and I always feel stupid AND embarrassed after.
be polite drivers. learn from from the close calls, and be thankful for them.
all my love darlings,
p.s…fyi Maine drivers…never speed from Wilton-Farmington, or anywhere in Skowhegan, or on route 4 from Turner to Auburn….just from experience, tickets, and almost tickets.
p.p.s…daily mantra: “the best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a cop in it.” {dudley.moore}